Allowing yourself the space to heal: The salience of self-care
about the Creator: Maia Helbling-Wilson First, WELCOME to my page. Please, make yourself comfortable before you begin reading because my hope for you is to be soaking in all that I have to offer you in this space. My name is Maia Helbling-Wilson and I am currently finishing up my classes at Portland State University for my degree of a Bachelor's of Science with an extensive interest in my major of psychology with a focus on relationships, behavior and trauma. I chose to study psychology because I had experienced and witnessed the impacts of trauma on the mental and physical well-being at many different times throughout my life and I wanted to do something about it; I wanted to be part of the change.
I hoped to gain an understanding of why people behave in ways that cause trauma to others in the first place, especially when they love them. This was really hard to understand as a child but as I got older and met more challenges, endured traumatic events, emotions, and injuries, and gained education about the biology and physiology of humans; then about their behaviors, moods, feelings, experiences, and perspectives, what I've come to believe is that much of the pain people inflict on loved ones often comes from a genuine belief that what they're doing and the way they are doing it, is for the right reason. They are simply treating someone the same way they were taught something because this was the expectation set during their experience, in other words, they're just doing what was done to them. I believe passing on traumatic dynamics is often a by-product of pain experienced or witnessed by an individual at a time or age when they were unable to cope with the experience. It's been suggested by some psychologists that innately, it may have made sense to harshly discipline children despite inflictions of trauma because life expectancy was so short and there were so many potential hazards that we don't have to worry about in modern society as often like predators in the wild or a fatal infection from a cut on your finger. Medically, we have evolved tremendously. It no longer makes sense to rush childhood, growing up, having babies before 20, or even 30. We now have the advantage of living in homes that animals can't infiltrate, mental health is becoming a more common topic of discussion, physical and emotional trauma and the long term impacts are readily accessible via the internet by more users than ever, we can recieve counseling in the palm of our hands, we have an incredible medical industry with a million and one ways to intervene to quickly alleviate so many complications that used to be regularly deadly to our population. We can finally take our time to tend to our offspring in ways that benefit their over-all well being and ability to survive and regulate themselves for the long haul in a world with so many opportunities. In the absence of this intense pressure to live, love and procreate as soon as possible because we only have a measly chance of surviving long enough to do so, we can and should take the time to avoid causing emotional trauma. It's difficult to learn to identify and break unhealthy habits in order to more sustainably self regulate and model being mindful in order to teach the next generation to do this, not to rush, but to think about their choices, consider their options, and their feelings, and to do what they think is right or best, not what is easiest or quickest unless that is what is right or best. Although there are many hazards we are lucky to not have to worry about, there are other new ones that we do have to worry about, that nobody in history has had to worry about or deal with before. Psychologists and other professionals are still discovering the impacts and effects of modern capabilities and experiences like chronic unlimited access to the internet and social media platforms, the excessive exposure to sales platforms, screen time, stimulus overload, regular and chronic indulgence in fast foods and unhealthy substances, as well as living through our most recent pandemic. As professionals continue to discover the effects of some of these things, they are simultaneously trying to determine the best ways to alleviate burnout, overstimulation, depression, anxiety and other related conditions that may or may not have causal relationships with excessively engaging in some of these behaviors. As a psychologist I think that what works best for each person should be catered to them and what they have experienced. I hope to be part of determining which regimen of therapeutic support is most beneficial to any person I have the opportunity to effect and I would be extremely happy to contribute to new theories and literature on the subject as I continue my education and develop my ideas around the vast connections between the mind, body and spirit. My goals & Intention
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"If you feel lost, dissapointed, hesitant, or weak, return to yourself, to who you are, here and now and when you get there, you will discover yourself like a lotus flower in full bloom. Even in a muddy pond, Beautiful & Strong"
The salience of self-care into practice:Center your soul: Self-care suggestions from all of us to all of you
I had the amazing opportunity to put into practice some of the things I am looking to offer future clients in this captone this term and we were able to design something exceptionally extraordinary. I was lucky enough to be the editor of this book and collaborate with my classmates to create a source of self-care suggestions that we plan to make available to others.
Through doing this project my goal for each contributor was to be lovingly reminded of the things that make their hearts feel more whole and their heads feel less full with aspirations that they utilize the sources of alleviation that they have individually chosen as significantly helpful for themselves in the future. Our intention and aspirations for this book are visible in our introduction statement: |
Our University study goals
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Resources for adults And teens whose parents suffered from mental illnessResources for mothers with depression/anxiety (PPD/PPa/PPOCD/etc)In the works Currently, I am working on an a small extension of Center My Soul. The purpose of the extension is for the reader to actively engage in reflecting and recording self-care practices that they've already identified as helpful to them as well as provide a space to list some new activities they would like to try. It would make my heart full to make both Center My Soul and the extension available to middle school and high school students, maybe even older elementary students. I feel that I would've benefited from a source like this when I was this age because I witnessed negative stigma surrounding mental illness and this would have been reassuring to me that what I was feeling I wasn't alone in; and that some of the ways I was trying to cope with stress were probably more hurtful than helpful. It would have been beneficial to have an idea of what it means to be mindful, to start becoming familiar with that verbiage at a younger age.
In addition to Center My Soul, I aspire to contribute to the growing body of literature around the topic of mental illness and trauma; specifically the impacts associated with exposure to traumatic experiences, the relationship between having experienced trauma and having a mental illness. I'd also like to expand on some ideas about neglecting, avoiding, or suppressing trauma and emotions and how that can have negative impacts on our physical health, and share my personal experience with this. As I continue my learning journey and my perspective grows, the most rewarding outcome would be the ability to develop and share revolutionary theories or ideas related to improving family dynamics, effective ways to influence the public to engage in harm-minimizing parenting styles, and how to treat and alleviate symptoms related to trauma (PTSD), post-partum mental health challenges (PPD, PPA, PSI) and other mental health disorders believed to be caused or impacted by an event(s) or situation(s). |
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